1991

S4.E1 ∙ Not a Good Day...

Sun, Jan 09, 1994

Veteran running star Sebastian Coe, MP, comes to the Leisure Centre for a Grand Opening, but not only does he discover that they've only named a toilet after him, but everybody keeps running off, chasing an 8-year-old boy for not paying for a 20p ticket; Coe even gets caught with his foot in a dead man's bicycle lock when he must urgently get to Parliament. Meanwhile Carole's toddler son Ben escapes by sawing his way out of the cupboard she keeps him in while trying desperately to apply Brittas' endless tariff rules, so she and Helen bait a trap-cage for him. The arrested boy's father mobilizes his Ancient Warfare Society friends to actually lay siege on the Centre with him as the lead centurion, and the police refuse to return for at least a week. Gordon refuses to surrender the boy, so the Ancient troops take and damage the centre by force.

8.2 /10

S4.E2 ∙ The Christening

Sun, Jan 16, 1994

Proud new father Gordon Brittas makes the whole staff practice in detail the perfect christening service for his twin sons, but his vicar brother Horatio, who is to preside, tells him he fell in love, and before he can elaborate, Helen--who was too busy choosing a hat to notice earlier--bursts in announcing that she has forgotten the boys somewhere, so everyone is sent out searching. Horatio's ladyfriend, Philippa Belmont, infuriates both Helen and Gordon during her very first conversations with them. The babies are found and the christening gets underway, but while he's looking for Philippa's lost ring, Gordon must advise Horatio whether to propose marriage, and Carole confesses to what she did to the cake.

7.9 /10

S4.E3 ∙ Biggles Tells a Lie

Sun, Jan 23, 1994

On a rare day when Gordon Brittas is out, everybody is surprised to see his office taken by 'manager' Colin Weatherby, almost unrecognizably well-dressed and odor-free. The reason sits there too: his daughter Stephanie from a brief affair, visiting for the first time ever, all the way from Tasmania, expecting the perfect father as he wrote her over the years to have various talents and occupations, such as an author pen-name and a TV show. Brittas was just returning a pen he had taken with him, but can't resist helping Tim with a boiler problem--which happens to be receptionist Carole's missing secret kitten Biggles. Meanwhile, the staff has seen a photograph of Helen that someone sent to Plaything Magazine; when Gavin tries to burn it in the boiler, Gordon finds it--and sees Colin's manager nameplate on his desk.

7.9 /10

S4.E4 ∙ Mr Brittas Changes Trains

Sun, Jan 30, 1994

Gordon is most eager to depart to press his candidacy for a European Committee on the Leisure Industry at a dinner, but Helen, who tells Laura he always makes waiters so furious they throw food at them, has psychosomatically-blocked muscles and various staff members are programmed to make wacky responses to certain signals by a hypnotist. Gordon asks him to cure Helen, but when he also goes into a trance, Laura convinces the therapist to temporarily remove his need to change the world.

8.2 /10

S4.E5 ∙ Playing with Fire

Sun, Feb 06, 1994

Helen has (conveniently?) booked a week in Cornwall a week before Gordon's leave, so he's even more focused on the job, notably Energy Conservation Week, producing a mountain of (5-page) forms to be filled in at every use of electric equipment. Colin builds a complete methane digestion system for human bio-waste. Gavin's fiancée Jenny turns up after five years abroad, with amnesia. His gay colleague, housemate, and partner Tim goes through hell while Mr. Brittas champions the welcome committee. When Gavin says she was in psychiatric therapy for years after her parents' traumatic accident which turned her into a pyromaniac, Laura realizes the importance of Linda's discovery that Jenny's suitcases contain fuel and lighters. Then Colin reports she's in the basement, admiring his methane experiment; she may not be angered but Gordon is there too.

7.9 /10

S4.E6 ∙ Shall We Dance?

Sun, Feb 13, 1994

Brittas sees the annual official dance as a rare occasion for his staff to mix with society, but is gravely disappointed when many seem unable or unwilling to get a suitable partner. Colin asks his milk-deliverywoman; Carole places an ad and gets an answer from her first teenage boyfriend, who is now wealthy but gets his hand stuck in the suggestion box and gets into worse trouble; Laura's Texan ex-partner Michael T. Farrell III turns up, disinherited and broke. Helen has rushed back home, but in what state? The weather isn't festive either.

7.7 /10

S4.E7 ∙ The Chop

Sun, Feb 27, 1994

Mr. Brittas has the staff play an intricate board game which paints a grim vision on life, seemingly designed to show that hard work pays, but as Tim finds out, it only demonstrates that life is unfair. Councilor Jack Drugget, the new man in charge of sports, announces that the council simply is no longer prepared to foot the bill for the Leisure Centre's enormous deficit, and offers Brittas a generous pension with a bonus if he leaves the county, but he won't hear of it. Receptionist Carole asks Laura to help convince Gordon that her son Ben needs a larger cupboard. Helen brings in a dog that only knows nasty tricks, such as biting the tops off swimsuits, so telling him is out of the question. Drugget finds a note that 'H.' took all the petty cash and realizes Helen used it to buy the dog; grumbling that he takes away the first thing ever she really wanted, she goes missing. The councilor insists on pressing charges unless Gordon takes the blame--as pretext to sack him. The dog proves a lovely pet but stays out of his doghouse--Helen was hiding there. Gordon packs his things, but on the way out he finds Carole also sacked and therefore homeless, joining his guillotine nightmares.

7.9 /10

S4.E8 ∙ High Noon

Sat, Mar 05, 1994

Since the last disaster actually got Gordon fired, he took a new job: petrol-station attendant. Laura isn't surprised to witness the endless lines of unhappy clients that his obsession for rules has created. An hour later, Helen tells Laura that Gordon has already been sacked. Meanwhile, at the Centre, only Colin misses Brittas' endless staff meetings and other nonsense. The new manager, Alan Digby, visits daily with unwanted, detailed 'suggestions,' but this time Gordon delivers a weather clock, personally installs it, tinkers with the timetable, and manages to exasperates a gas delivery truck driver enough to be declared persona non grata and cause a seriously dangerous incident in the center during Alan's short absence.

8.2 /10