Episode list

2point4 Children

The Parent Trap

Sun, Sep 04, 1994
The house is in chaos - builders are still modifying the kitchen to the health inspector's standard and David is running a sideline in providing cockroaches to school-friends. At least Jenny is happy with new boyfriend Clive,whose parents,Laura and Harry,invite Bill and Ben for dinner. The evening goes well - until the Porters find that they have accidentally brought some of David's cockroaches with them. Next day Harry and Laura pay a surprise visit - and discover Bill and Ben trying to stab a massive inflatable pope which Ben picked up at a boot sale and will not deflate itself.
8.2 /10
Family Plot

Sun, Sep 11, 1994
In an attempt to make the family enjoy quality time together Bill takes out the fuse wire and puts in in a self-addressed envelope in a pillar box. With no television,radio or computer the family is really bored and a game of Charades only ends up with them talking about television shows. Bill's efforts to get Rona to help her retrieve the envelope causes a misunderstanding with Mr and Mrs Grimes - who get an even bigger shock when Ben,after groping for a light in his darkened attic,ends up in their bedroom.
7.5 /10
Fortuosity

Sun, Sep 18, 1994
Bill receives a chain letter threatening bad luck if not sent on to others. Against Ben's advice she rips it up but then bad things happen. The builders are involved in a road accident,a client dies,David loses his trunks at the swimming pool and Bill falls out with Rona after accusing her of sending the letter. Eventually the newly-divorced Tina arrives and confesses to sending the letter as she was feeling down and knew that sensible Bill would tear it up as she did not believe in superstition. However Ben is about to make a parachute jump and the woman race to the air base to ensure his safety - only for a different sort of calamity to happen.
7.3 /10
Curiosity Killed the Cat
Bill is laid up with flu,aware that the household cannot function without her and biding her time by listening in on Jenny's phone calls and spying on Rona in her renewed attempt to get pregnant by Tony - which results in a paranoid Rona believing Tony's ex-wife is stalking him. Ben is looking after Snowball, the Grimes' cat, whilst they are on holiday and ends up crossing town and getting very dirty and dishevelled in pursuit of the wandering feline. He gets it back to the house - but is it Snowball? And if not why is a muffled mewing coming from somewhere in the newly decorated kitchen?
8.2 /10
Frenzy

Sun, Oct 02, 1994
The new kitchen is now complete but Bill is too busy working to listen to Jenny,worried that her performance at the school concert will be overshadowed by the buxom Charlene and her Madonna impression. Fortunately Ben and David come to her rescue as the trio wow the audience with their Blues Brothers number. Bill meanwhile goes to visit Rona and finds two escaped snakes in the living-room. With Tony worn out by Rona and asleep upstairs the two women are trapped against the wall until Bill looks out of the window and sees that her house is on fire. She takes drastic action to escape into the street.
8.3 /10
You Only Live Twice
Bill despairs as she learns from the fireman that the blaze was caused by faulty wiring and surveys her gutted house. Rona lets the Porters stay with her and also persuades Tony not to move out - by imprisoning him in the fold-up bed. Bette turns up with a skip,personifying the spirit of the Blitz as she oversees the house's refurbishment,leading to the Porters admiring their newly decorated home.
8.1 /10
Relax-ay-voo

Sun, Dec 25, 1994
On Christmas Eve - having ended up with four trees - Bill is amazed when the message 'Is That You,Bill?' appears on David's computer and cannot be switched off. In reply to cryptic messages Bill cripples the country's television transmission and causes bad weather,discovering to her horror that she has the power to make anything she wants happen. After Rona has got in on the act by summoning three scantily-clad and extremely puzzled young marines it suddenly dawns on the family who the 'Bill' is whose wires have inadvertently crossed with David's computer. Before anything else can happen the family flees to a French chateau for a rendition of the song Relaxez-Vous.
8.5 /10
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