1995

S3.E1 ∙ Tiffany's Rival

Sat, Sep 07, 1996

Smart, blond, tall and long-legged, not to mention equally devious, Sable hits the scene, and Tiffany is worried about having competition that is going to keep her on her toes. Dark secrets are exchanged in a game of detente. Only to get spilled. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star gets a whole new meaning.

5.9 /10

S3.E2 ∙ Beach Party

Sat, Sep 14, 1996

Senior Ditch Day, and they're off to the beach. Tiffany has to hold her own against blond rival Sable as they compete for the attentions of a boy.

6.8 /10

S3.E3 ∙ Angel Gone Bad

Sat, Sep 21, 1996

Jack is dismayed to find out that darling daughter Tiffany might have opted for the oldest profession. But she's just been selling pictures of herself with nerd boys, posing as The Girl Back Home.

6 /10

S3.E4 ∙ The Temptation of Jack

Sat, Sep 28, 1996

Om a mission for Tiffany, Jack puts on his party pants as he tries chasing after Sable's Mom.

7.2 /10

S3.E5 ∙ Lightning Boy

Sat, Oct 05, 1996

Ryan is delusional after getting struck by lightning, and expects to have superhero powers. Behold, alter ego Lightning Boy prances about the kitchen in underwear that is outerwear. Jenny wants the experience to boost Ryan's confidence in himself. Everybody humors Ryan as he sets himself up for a confrontation with an earth-bound meteor.

6 /10

S3.E6 ∙ Bingo! Bingo! Bingo!

Sat, Oct 12, 1996

Inexplicably, out of character, Tiffany gets bitten by the bingo bug. Hooked as she is, she is now Mom's girl, and Jack falls out of favor as the parent of choice. How to win her back? And how will Mr. Floppy make unattainable Hollywood vixen Drew Barrymore jealous?

7.1 /10

S3.E7 ∙ Halloween XXVII

Tue, Oct 29, 1996

The Mad Hair Hacker goes after Tiffany, Sable, and Tiffany's friend Amber, to chop off their long hair. Meanwhile, Jack and Jennie look forward to terrorizing the neighborhood kids and giving them candy cigarettes on Halloween.

6.2 /10

S3.E8 ∙ Rock and Roll

Sat, Nov 02, 1996

Loser boy Ryan has a band. Thanks to hot sis Tiffany. Sleazy-looking record producer took one look at the haphazardly shot promo video, saw inadvertent walk-on redhead sister with the long, long legs, and signed on the loser band. See Ryan perform. Just try not to hear him squawk, er, sing. Then see Glorious Tiffany do the Gloria Estefan to the Miami - no, Malloy - Sound Machine.

6.9 /10

S3.E9 ∙ The Pride of the Injuns

Sat, Nov 09, 1996

6.2 /10

S3.E10 ∙ Eating Hollywood

Sat, Nov 16, 1996

7.6 /10

S3.E11 ∙ High and Dry

Sat, Nov 23, 1996

Breaking out into sprays of sweat every time he's near a girl, Ryan resorts to copious overuse of deodorant. By the cans full. Caking his underarms. After Tiffany lost out on an unwise bet, she had to find him a date. Turns out she's a refugee set on American citizenship. At all costs. Told by the desperate woman that she prefers manly smells, he delves about and sheds excess bricks of powdery mess there in the car. Which leaves evidence that gets misinterpreted as cocaine abuse by all-of-a-sudden concerned parents Jack and Jennie who watched an Are Your Kids On Drugs alert on TV.

7.2 /10

S3.E12 ∙ The Tell-Tale Lipstick

Sat, Dec 14, 1996

Tiffany decides to be bad.

5.9 /10

S3.E13 ∙ Sternberg

Sat, Jan 18, 1997

Tiffany dates Herbie Sternberg and Ryan has a rash.

5.9 /10

S3.E14 ∙ The President

Sat, Feb 01, 1997

Bored with her successful life, looking for new challenges, ever-successful Tiffany manipulates eternal loser Ryan into running for school president, figuring that he'll be her puppet on a string. But instantly the marionette breaks loose. Now she must reel him in.

6.2 /10

S3.E15 ∙ Tiffany on the Wild Side

Sat, Feb 08, 1997

Like mother, like daughter. Tiffany dates a biker. Bikers now remind Jennie of her bad boy Beau Bobby Joe Satan, who once gave her the thrill ride of her life, but then dumped her with a promise of a phone call that never came. She tries to warn newly-minted leather lady Tiffany against giving her heart - not to mention anything more - to the devil-may-care Johnny Stompanado. For tomorrow's phone call never comes.

6.1 /10

S3.E16 ∙ The Potato Rebellion

Sat, Feb 15, 1997

School cafeteria dragon lady, chain-smoking Bulgarian Mrs. Garbaggio, feeds the kids a steady diet of mashed potatoes chronically infested by the most unsavory junk. Beauty Tiffany tries to reason with the beast, to no avail. And her appeal to the School Board bring less than stellar results. Her attempt to overthrow the draconian hag fails miserably - the old witch packs a gun, and the kids had none. Insomniac Jack's sleepless lament gets re-tuned into a potent protest song, We Will Eat No More Po-Ta-Toes, sparking a county-wide uprising which leaves the city in flames. All because of a song. As suspected folk singers flee, Jack happily sleeps through the carnage-filled network TV news report.

6.2 /10

S3.E17 ∙ B-Minus Blues

Sat, Feb 22, 1997

In English class, star pupil Tiffany scores a B. Actually, a B minus. And that's really just a tarted up C. For a girl who aims to go to Harvard. All because of disgruntled old teacher Monteleone, fed up with being underpaid, who rewards mediocrity with an A, while originality and creative input earn naught but scorn. Parroting Ryan gets an easy A for regurgitating total tripe, so that's the last straw - Tiffany has to stand up in class to the sour-faced less-than-intellectual bully. And Jack plans to make a movie with young talent, so flyers went up all over town, and a big party is expected, the clatter of high heels - that is, until the clump of heavy jackboots arrive.

6.8 /10

S3.E18 ∙ From Russia with Love

Sat, Apr 19, 1997

Ryan gets a Russian mail order bride

6.5 /10

S3.E19 ∙ Little Ice Cream Shop of Horrors

Sat, Apr 26, 1997

Tiffany gets a job

7.1 /10

S3.E20 ∙ Shampoo

Sat, May 03, 1997

Ryan at long last finds his calling in life. Accidentally. As a cutter of women's hair. No, not as a barber. As a stylist. But when he requests $200 from his Dad to go off to beauty school, Jack nearly has a heart attack wanting to die of shame, believing his son to be gay, oops!, the other way. Before you can say "Warren Beaty" though, Mr. Ryan becomes a huge hit with the ladies, some of whom even spill over Ross' way. Cutting the hair of a female Hollywood power monger lands Mr. Ryan in pole position to produce her next movie. But wise and thoughtful parents Jack and Jennie want him to go back to school, as finishing his education is more important.

7.3 /10

S3.E21 ∙ College!

Sat, May 10, 1997

7.2 /10

S3.E22 ∙ The Joy of Meat

Sat, May 17, 1997

Animal activist little Ross foists being a vegetarian upon the meat-guzzling family. It's either that, or they all lose out on the $10 000 that goes along with the award. Salads await. And Linda McCartney's lasagna. Tiffany rebels, and even Jack's favorite child gets pushed out as the lure of money talks. In the absence of his regular daily diet, Jack gets rhapsodical as he enthuses about the virtues of meat. And then Jasper barks at something he found in the cupboard. A traitor to his own cause gets revealed.

6.9 /10