Malcolm can't hide his excitement on the morning of his 37th birthday, Arthur Capstick calls round with a bag of sherbet lemons for Mr. Merton, and a lack of guests sees the party get off to a disappointingly slow start.
Mrs. Merton agrees to do a bit of babysitting for a pregnant neighbour, Malcolm receives the first reply from his pen pal of twenty-six years, and Arthur shows off his fancy footwork when he joins in with a Riverdance.
Malcolm manages to arrange a date with Judith Potts from the chemist, Arthur forgets to put some stuff on Mr. Merton's troublesome gums, and Mrs. Merton tries to make sure that her son looks a right bobby-dazzler.
Mrs. Merton reaches for the A-Z Book of Diseases when Malcolm falls ill, Mr. Malik from the chemist pops by to offer some medical advice, and a phonecall to the pet shop reveals the truth about the whole situation.
The house is made ready for a visit from Aunt Morag from Scotland, Malcolm struggles to reach a decision about ornament arrangement, and Mrs. Merton decides that Arthur and her twin sister should be together.
Malcolm and Mrs. Merton arrive back from the funeral of Mr. Merton, Glenn Miller's music almost manages to bring some life to the occasion, and the vicar can't apologise enough for trying to bury the wrong man.
