Director's Cut

Hazel runs a beauty salon out of her house, but makes extra money by providing ruthless women to do hit jobs. L.T. is a parasite, and contacts Hazel looking for work when he runs out of money. She is reluctant to use him for a hit, since she prefers using women, but decides to try him on a trial basis. Meanwhile, the local cop she pays off wants an arrest to make it look like he's actually doing his job, but she doesn't want to sacrifice any of her "associates." Several other side plots are woven in, populated with characters from the sleazy side of life.

A television weatherman scams a local lottery.

Brilliant but arrogant scientist Victor Frankenstein builds a man from spare body parts, only for the monster to come alive and wreak havoc.

Grandpa Sam Dracula is essentially Dracula who assembled Herman because no man was good enough for his daughter Lily, a sexy vampiress. Lily's niece Marilyn the freak is actually normal and Lily and Herman's only child, Eddie, has his werewolf tendencies surface in puberty, forcing the family to relocate to their famous 1313 Mockingbird Lane address.

A romantic comedy about a girl with an unrequited crush on a boy who thinks she's bad in bed, so she goes out to get more "experience".

Equality for all? Or not really? And why not? And how about next year? These eternal questions are explored in this genre-bending film which follows our civilization's eternal quest for "the perfect balance" between love, tolerance, morality, censorship, tradition, and experimentation.