You Don't Mess with the Zohan

Maggie and her snooty society friends fool Jiggs and his buddies down at Dinty's tavern into not only signing a petition to close the bar, but they also trick them into taking the "temperaance" pledge to forsake all alcohol.

Multi-Hand Chick asks Crazy Frog for protection after stealing someone's wallet at the casino. Foolishly he accepts, and even more foolishly he follows her home and removes his Invincible Armor when she pretends to be willing to sleep with him. Of course she steals it, and when he tries to follow her, he's stopped by Dirty Tiger who is on a mission to bring Crazy Frog back to his wife. However, Dirty Tiger would really like to have that armor himself...

Boss Peaches wants her revenge. Why? Because nobody dumps Boss Peaches... not even Bruiser Bom-Bash. Unfortunately for her, Peaches will have to get in line with the rest of them. Ryuken, the loyal fan-boy of Punchy McBritches, will stop at nothing to regain Punchy's honor after her recent loss against Bruiser. But, will his past catch up to him before he gets his chance to take out Bruiser Bom-Bash and claim the title of the "Toughest in Town" for himself? Or will Peaches beat him to the punch and steal his only chance for glory?

A martial artist must train incessantly to defeat the brutally powerful thief called Centipede.

Muggs and Glimpy, two East Side Kids in the army, return to their neighborhood, supposedly on furlough; actually, Muggs has been honorably discharged with a physical defect, but he tells no one of this. Danny, another East Side kid, is in jail because a large amount of medical supplies have been stolen from the warehouse where he works. Muggs see Spider, a new member of the gang, flashing a large amount of money around, and Muggs shrewdly turns toughie, boasting that he has a dishonorable discharge because of thievery. This leads Spider to confide in Muggs that he is the one who has been aiding in the theft of supplies from the warehouse, and he gets paid for the loot by Larry, operator of a nightclub where Muggs' sister, Milly, is an entertainer. Fingers, a henchman for Larry, kills Spider when he learns that Muggs has been let in on the operation. The police then suspect Muggs of killing Spider.