Vampires Suck

A group of office workers go every Friday afternoon to the White Pyramid, a 50-foot tower of LSD.

Jackson is a lonely serial killer who is really beginning to question the point of all his killing. He is losing focus on why he started to kill in the first place. The future looks bleak until he meets a blind girl, Shelly, who begins to show him that life isn't so bad. It is all up to Jackson to decide if he's going to stop killing and start learning responsibility and think about finding a real job and starting a family.

A failed film producer and an unemployed Chartered Accountant decide to make a 'sure flop' movie

Dracula's daughter, Dracoola, ends her self-imposed exile, seduces women into offering her their bodies for all time and enslaves Wally Van Helsing the simpering descendant of the famed vampire hunter to do her bidding.

The Cannes Film Festival. It's where deals get made, producers get laid, and stars get paid. It's where all the movie industry meets to buy and sell all the movies on the planet. And it's where the art of the deal can be filled with more laughs than the deal itself. Sy Lerner is the quintessential movie producer, when he makes a bet that he can take any kid off the street and turn him into a superstar overnight using the universal language of the festival: hype. He meets Frank Rhinoslavsky and turns him into 'Frank Rhino, one of the hottest screenwriters to hit Cannes since Faulkner and Hemingway.' It's not long before celebrities and producers are lining up to meet this hot young star. Dennis Hopper, Treat Williams, Johnny Depp, John Malkovich and more, all want to meet the 'next Quentin Tarantino.' Sy charms them with his own particular blend of hype and substance, and by the end of the festival, has lined up one of the great casts of all time. But Sy Lerner still has a few tricks up his sleeve for his wife, Frank Rhino and the myriad of people that have invested in this nonexistent, non-scripted film. He drops dead. And all the money the invested in his film goes up in smoke. But in the end, Sy Lerner has pulled the ultimate con, making him truly the one and only, 'Cannes Man.'

Otto, a young man from East-Frisia, comes to the big city of Hamburg to make his fortune. Most of all he is engaged with two problems: How can he impress Silvia, a wealthy young girl; and where does he get 9,876.50 DM to pay off a loan shark?