Summary Segment 1: Sunrise Semester: Conversational New Yorkese with Norman Gorman; Small dogs, Walter and Dorothy, and regular coffee.

Segment 2: Commercial: Tex and Edna Boil's Organ Emporium: New Location; The Emporium has moved. Tex and Edna bring back budgies from Brazil.

Segment 3: Kanadian Korner 6: Back Bacon and Snow Chains; Bob cooks up some back bacon, while Doug's got snow chains on his feet. Doug gets the camera to zoom in.

Segment 4: Promo: Donahue: The Pope; The pope answers to a higher order.

Segment 5: 60/20; Earl hosts this hard-hitting investigative reporting program and looks into the influence of television and the media. Earl talks to Dr. Angly from the state penitentiary, who figures it's the coffee Earl's drinking. He comes back two weeks later, and sure enough, Earl's got a better handle on things. Earl next interviews detective Tulios, who blows him off. Jack Wallace turns the tables on Earl and takes over his show.

Segment 6: Message from Guy: Satellite Orbit Decaying; Guy asks for money to help get the satellite back into its proper orbit.

Segment 7: PSA: Be a Foster Boss; Give a charlady a chance.

Segment 8: The Lone Ranger Show; (This is a spoof of the Lone Ranger and The Tonight Show; Featuring Johnny Carson). The Lone Ranger does his monologue; they do the 'Visitor from the East' bit; Kip Adotta comes out with sub-standard material, gets hog-tied and branded; Wishbone comes out, and just as he's about to reveal who's responsible for rustling cattle, takes an arrow. The Ranger rushes off to investigate. (The Lone Ranger 'William Tell Overture' theme plays over the end credits.)

• Comedy
• Sketch Comedy